Mario vs PeeWee - Battlespace 39
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Mario vs PeeWee - Battlespace 39
Match Description
Thickly muscular, PeeWee looks like everything a Thunders Arena star is supposed to be. On the mat, though, he has proved his incompetence over and over. His win-loss record this past year has been abysmal, and most of the other wrestlers at the Arena see him as some sort of comic buffoon. Im a joke? he asks, in all innocence, as Mario cant stop himself from chuckling, just remembering the way PeeWee had wrestled the day before. Mario stands by, trying not to crack up as PeeWee performs a few stretches pre-match, being one with the mat, as PeeWee calls it (perhaps not the best objective for a wrestler). PeeWees stretch routine is one part dying swan and two parts beached whale. Mario shakes his head and asks, Do you have any idea what youre doing right now? Not really, PeeWee admits, but I feel great. A lot of PeeWees shtick is simply a broad caricature of the fans adoration of the companys wrestlers in the comments section, their fawning muscle worship and desire to experience what it might be like to be bested by one of these big men. As Mario easily takes him down, PeeWee exudes, Youre so dominant and so strong. Ive never felt the wrath of a man of 240 pounds. Later, after both men shed their near-identical singlets to reveal the tight, skimpy briefs underneath, hes awestruck by Marios hard slabs of muscle, gushing, Youre like a Greek god God, youre amazing! PeeWee alternates between good-natured self-abasement, admitting his deficiencies as a grappler, and dogged insistence that he actually does have some ace wrestling moves somewhere. His slow, deliberate line delivery is usually likable and funny, too, a bit like Kevin Malones on The Office. But Mario just wants PeeWee to shut up and wrestle. Hes also worried that PeeWees incompetence risks injuries to both wrestlers, and at one point he storms out of the mat room. He returns later to find that PeeWee hasnt budged from the spot where he left him, so he offers to teach the man a thing or two about the art and science of wrestling. Thanks to Mario, then, we get to see an array of the fine wrestling maneuvers that we expect of a match featuring two brawny guys: nelsons, firemans carry, Boston crabs, chokes, bearhugs, scissors, clutches, and choking (with one of the discarded singlets). Occasionally, PeeWee rouses and even asserts control, but only temporarily, because, as Mario observes, All you do is talk and flex. In the end, though, whatever you may think of the way PeeWee runs his mouth, Mario finds a very effective and practical way of shutting it up.
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